Thread for All the piggies go Wee Wee Wee Index | New Thread | Reply | Close | Stick | Delete  All the piggies go Wee Wee Wee Joker 5:14pm, September 08, 2009 [Edit] [Delete] Gotham. Such a depressing place. *a faceless visage stood high above street level in a tower of structured steel and glass.. the Joker's purple custom-made pants and shoes illuminated by the moonlight outside as he slowly approached the glass* All these people just.. running around like their lives mean something. Don't they know they're just toys?? Pawns in a big scheme. *his wide red smile opened, curling wickedly as he peered out the glass windows his green hair catching the light of the moon* They're all going to be joining in on the fun soon. HehehehahahaHahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! *the following day a video would be delivered to the Gotham News Network. Once played it would show the Joker sitting on a large purple velvet chair with gold trim. The gold looked scratched and marked all over, like it was worn from years and years of harsh use and scratches. A wide, toothy grin decorated the Joker’s face, the dark paint around his eyes magnifying them along with the red going across his face, lengthening his smile. He leaned forward looking into the lens of the camera* Hellooooo people of the Gotham!! It’s your old pal, The Joker, here to tell you about all the fun I have planned for you. Haha! I bet you can’t wait huh? Oh it will be stupendous! HAHAHAHAHA!! *the video cut and suddenly showed the Joker standing in front of a wall with a crudely drawn map of Gotham on it. In front of the map was a table with a black tablecloth on it going all the way to the floor, his hands were on his hips as he leaned forward towards the camera* I’m sure you’re all wondering just what I have in store.. well, if I told you it’d ruin the fun now wouldn’t it? *throwing his head back in a laugh* HA HA HA! *he stopped himself, clearing his throat, leaning forward once again towards the camera, waving it forward* But I will say… *he turned abruptly, his gloved hand yanking the table cloth off the table that lined the wall behind him, revealing underneath it a fat man, who few would recognize as a member of the Wayne Enterprises Board of Directors. The balding fat man had duck tape over his mouth, even with the dimmed light from the shadow cast down from the table it was clear he’d been sweating profusely. Eyes wide and terrified as he looked up at the Joker as he looked down at the man who was also restrained via rope, the glasses on the man’s face were disheveled and off-angle as well as having a red smile painted onto his face over-top the duck tape. Joker reached down, grabbing the man by the arm and pulling him out from under the table, looking to a henchmen off screen* Get over here and hold this one… *the henchmen, wearing a clown mask moved over, helping the Joker lift the man to a stand in front of the table, then holding him still from behind. Joker patted his hands, rubbing what could only assume to be any sweat from his gloves off on the front of his jacket after taking a step back. He raised his head, still hunched over though eyeing the fat man* You’re… you’re not scared are you? *Joker’s eyes growing a bit wider* Cause I mean.. what with the Bat-man out there I’m sure you’ll be safe right? *he nodded his head, lightly shrugging his shoulders as the Fat man visibly shook a bit, Joker suddenly closed the gap between him and the restrained fat man, reaching up and ripping off the duck tape from the man’s face, the man yelled in pain and fear as Joker leaned his face close to the man’s face* You see.. *licking his lips, his voice dropping lower* what you’re experiencing now.. is what some call cognizance. Ya see those people *his gloved hand turns, index finger pointing the man’s attention if only but for a split second, his voice rising to an amused high pitch *the ones watching this tape.. right now. They can’t see it.. *he shook his head slightly* what you see right now. They can’t see just how pointless it all is. Well *he paused, licking his lips and looking down as he pulls out a gun and swipes the barrel clean with his hand, his voice dropping again* we’re gonna show them just heh just how pointless it all is. *Joker raised the gun, pressing the barrel hard against his own temple, looking at the man, moving up and down like an anxious child* Do you know the poem.. about the little piggies? Hm? *the fat man looked in fear for his life and a sting of bewilderment at the painted face of the man before him* Wha-what? *the fat man said* Do you know the poem about the little piggies? *the fat man blinked before replying* Ye-yeah Say it *the Joker replied, the barrel of the gun still dancing against his white skin* what? *the Joker’s free hand rose, grabbing the man around the chin, squeezing his cheeks together as he looked into his eyes, face nearly pressed against the fat man’s, Joker’s voice was low* Say it *the fat man looked confused, shaking his head slightly as the Joker let him go and took a few steps back, just out of the camera shot as the camera remained focused on the fat man who continued to stutter-speak* Th-this little p-piggy went to market, Th-this *and suddenly Joker’s arm holding the gun raised up in frame of the camera and fired, the bullet entering the man’s head as his body went limp. For only a brief second it showed the dead man before Joker grabbed the camera by the front of it, though not covering the lens, and pulled it to his face, his face was mere inches from it as he spoke* That little piggy had none… HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *not long after the previous video would be edited and then aired on GNN to censor the gunshot killing the Wayne Enterprises Board Member an anonymous caller calling himself Mr. J would tip off a GNN intern to check the Gotham Rail Network’s website. The Rail Network would also begin getting flooded with calls from concerned citizens who had tried going to their site but, due to some freakish accident wound up on this page with a black background and a video playing. Joker had gotten a bit technical with his terror and hacked the Rail Network’s website to redirect visitors to this video which showed him.. standing in front of the wall with the map of Gotham crudely painted on it once more. The video started with him brushing his green hair back before abruptly stopping, clapping his gloved hands together he looked forward to the camera* I’d-uh like to thank the creative geniuses down at GNN for editing my work.. *he’d step closer to the camera, leaning forward and tilting his head, raising a finger* You really just.. ruined that bit of fun. *his head dropped as he looked at the camera lens still, his voice dropping in pitch* But! Who am I to let a few downers stop me from my fun?! HA HA HA! *he rose, turning and walking towards the wall with the map before stopping, staring at it for a moment with his back to the camera before he turns, looking down* Ya know.. *approaching the camera and pausing as he looks into the lens* It really bugs me… people today. *he shakes his head looking off around the room* I mean there’s just so many things wrong in the world and you just eat! And eat! And eat! And eat! It’s no wonder why everyone isn’t just blowing up and getting huge now-a-days. *he shook his head some more before looking at the camera* Well, I-see.. I plan to stop that. That’s why I went around to all the stores in Gotham and injected a little surprise into all the meat. So.. *he lifted his finger before bringing it down and pointing it at the camera* all you meat eaters out there are in for a nice surprise whenever you take a bite of that meaty burger. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *he stopped himself and looked into the camera with that wide maniacal grin* Those little piggies won’t be having roast beef. HA HA HA! Toodles! *the video would end. The announcement of the tainted meat hit the airwaves on the radio, tv, and via word of mouth through cell phones and emails like wildfire throughout the city.. oh the Joker was having such fun* -----[Updated 09/14/09]----- *the Joker was a man not driven by greed, or anything other than creating his sort of fun.. CHAOS. Ya see. He's an agent of it.. Chaos.. choosing to do what he wants when he wants and sure it doesn't match any sort of 'plan'.. At least not to normal people. He doesn't operate on that sort of judgment, on 'normal' logic. He has his own way, his own logic, his own judgment. It was time, for his next move, and sure he wanted to kinda wait a bit but why wait when there's so much fun to be had?! So he broke out the old video camera and recorded a little ditty that was, delivered by hand to the Gotham News Network, this time though the cops would be waiting for the delivery man.. which is what Joker counted on.. but we'll get to that in a moment* *the video burned from static into the image itself showing the joker leaning close to the lens* Hello again, Gothamites! *he leaned closer to the lens with one of his eyes as his voice deepened* Hope you enjoyed my last bit of meaty fun. HA HA HA! *his voice went back up as he leaned back from the camera and continued* See.. I originally planned to, have a little fun with you all.. wait it out til the perfect moment and all that trifle but Ahhh who cares, right? You guys are all about the fun right? *he paused looking into the camera and continued* Of course you are! Who am I kidding?! This city probably has more life in it than anywhere else in the world!?!! That's why I'm making this special announcement! Today, starting at 8AM my boys and I will be starting a campaign to put a smile on all the faces of you rush hour rats out there.. HA HA HA HA HA! Toodles! *the video would cut to static again* *now to the delivery henchman that was sent.. he was sent with 2 others waiting outside. Once he was apprehended the cops ripped open his jacket to search him, finding several large containers that exploded, releasing a powerful mixture of laughing gas with an unknown substance that would kill anyone in close vicinity of it. The cops and people in the lobby area would be dead, after that the substance would lose its effectiveness though it would remain in the laughing gas as it entered the ventilation system of the whole building. Though it did not prove fatal after a certain point it did put a permanent smile on the face of everyone breathing it for a good 2-3 hours. With the delivery henchman and the cops dead the 2 henchman outside would slip on gas masks, spray painted with big red smiles. These guys were also the bearers of the real tape. They took it in and up to the floor of the morning broadcast of GNN. One looking in the camera that had been pointed downward by a laughing camera man* Dis message is from da Joker HeheHA HA!*the other henchman would start the tape. Afterwards they would run out into the street and disappear.. though if Bats wasn't too far he could track them down and interrogate them if he wanted since they weren't going to go back to Joker until he told them to.. and he wasn't going to tell them to.* *in the meantime, Joker along with the rest of his boys were fulfilling the promise of the tape. In a helicopter confiscated from a local hospital.. they dropped powder over the congested highways, byways, and outdoor train platforms near the heart of Gotham. This powdered substance was laced with the substance that was released in the ventilation systems of the GNN building which, once inhaled by the crowds below sitting in their cars would cause them to break out in laughter, some so extreme they may accidentally slam on the gas pedal and careen into the cars in front of them. Others will fall out of their vehicles because they were laughing so hard, while others who were the unhealthier verge of the bunch would probably get heart attacks from it. Either way, the commute into work for those who go through central Gotham would have been hell, if not impossible to do. Due to random accidents, and slow traffic to begin with, the massive delays would probably shut down the business sector on a busy Monday morning for most of the day. Places like Wayne Enterprises would probably fall victim to a lack of employee presence up until noon or 1pm, if even then. Some who were laughing but weren’t in the thick of the traffic would be able to get off the highway and get to work but most would remain gridlocked. This would also prove an issue for emergency personnel as after the Joker got done coating the highways with his Laugh-Crack. This little piggy goes Wee Wee Wee all the way home* *He would have his boys blows off the sides of Arkham Asylum. Releasing many dangerous inmates into the world once more, though not all of them, but enough to cause Bats a headache for quite a while. * Edited 1:58pm, September 14, 2009 by Joker, author.  Recap Joker 1:38pm, September 14, 2009 [Edit] [Delete] Just a quick recap for the boys and girls who are too lazy to read: The Joker has... Sent a video to the Gotham News Network where he killed a board member of Wayne Enterprises Hacked the Gotham Train website with a video stating that all the meat in Gotham had been tainted by himself and his crew. He did this to mask the actual 'taint' of various produce of grocery stores around the city. Causing those that ate the produce to suffer longer/die because of being turned away by some hospital staff thinking they were part of the tainted meat scare. Blew up the lobby of the Gotham News Network building. Dropped "Laugh-Crack" on the Gotham highways near the center of the city, causing massive backups, wrecks, and a handful of deaths. Using it as a diversion he blew up 2 sides of Arkham Asylum releasing multiple (about 15) inmates into the city. Index | New Thread | Reply | Close | Stick | Delete