Iku
2:16am, December 23, 2010
[Edit]
[Delete] | A new pizza franchise is in town, and is quickly cornering the market. Cosa Nostra Pizza is a Franchise Owned Quasi-Inter-Galactic Entity (FOQIGE) emphasizing fine Italian goods and fast service.
Cosa Nostra pizza - Thirty minutes or less, or the Deliveryman Dies!!!!
As a result, delivery men for Cosa Nostra pizza are often equipped with tricked out speeders and all the heavy ordnance, weapons, ammunition and tech they can carry. Pizza "Deliverators" are generally selected only after a BRUTAL physical and psychological test battery. Some applicants do not survive this screening.
Apply today! Get in on the ground floor of THE DELIVERATORS. After all... "You've got a friend. A friend, in the family."
Disclaimer: By ordering a pizza from Cosa Nostra, you hereby authorize Deliverators (in the event of non-payment) to employ "Heroic Methods" to bravely protect FOQIGE profits for Cosa Nostra's Tattoine division. This may be accomplished through dramatic dismemberment, death, or sustained psychological trauma to the non-payee. These grievous repercussions may or may not be limited to the non-payee, and may also extend to anyone who attempts to protect the non-payee, or anyone who simply occupies the reasonable vicinity (35 meters) of the non-payee. By ordering a pizza from Cosa Nostra, you also accept responsibility for any damages done by the Deliverator to the people, objects, or residences near you in event of non-payment. Enjoy your pizza!!! <3 <3 <3
Edited 2:20am, December 23, 2010 by Iku, author. |
